Take a Shot at the Machine Girl
Media / 2/23/2009 9:10:36 PM
Ohhh, don't you love a crazy, blood-soaked, Japanese schoolgirl revenge flick?! Words of recommendation for this latest 2007 Asian installment are brought to you by our recurring guest writer, Jude W. Mire. And if you're interested in the polar opposite in dark entertainment, check out my "Jill's p.s." at the bottom of the page.
The movie opens with a poor Japanese boy being tormented by bullies. A cute girl in a schoolgirl outfit shows up and demands they stop. When they don't, she attaches an eight-barrel machine gun to
the stump of her left arm and proceeds to slaughter them all. They scream, they run, they squirt blood
from their injuries as if their veins were high-pressure hoses. Welcome to the
world of The Machine Girl! Now, lets get one thing straight, these are a different
brand of bullies in the world director Noboru Iguchi brings us. These aren't "steal your lunch money" bullies; these are knife wielding, kung fu fighting, and deadly bullies.
Over the years Asia has brought us a good number of truly great horror flicks. Once you've seen them they're hard to forget; the acupuncture and piano wire in The Audition, the skull regurgitating mini-Godzilla in The Host, or the slow grind of imminent doom in Ringu. Most discriminating fans of creepy cinema learned long ago that what comes out of the orient can be a potent recipe for fear. American movie studios regularly seek to remake them for mainstream audiences and, in most cases, fail miserably. If there’s one thing to know about Asian horror is this; do not dilute with remakes, they’re worth the subtitles or bad dubbing!
Now, The Machine Girl isn’t in the same class as most high quality horror. Don’t expect stellar acting (unless you count menacing glares from beneath straight bangs acting), fantastic special effects, or even a plot that really makes much sense. But Machine Girl proves that you need any of these to make a hell of a fun movie! It makes up for all it lacks in sheer ridiculous, over-the-top, imagery and gory action. The list of blood soaked insanity includes human finger sushi, bloody vomit, ninja’s in what appear to be jogging suits, arm tempura, psycho’s in football helmets, and (saving the best for last), the Drill Bra! All this adds up to a level of unrivalled cinematic cheese!
The Machine Girl is a must see for anyone who wonders just how gory cyborg schoolgirls can get! And don't worry, if this isn't enough for you, director Iguchi is already working on a sequel: The Drill Bra Sisters!
Jude W. Mire
Jill's p.s. If you're interested in the
EXTREME opposite of "Machine Girl" and you're in Chicago between now and March 22'nd, get thee to the theatre production of Darren
Callahan's "The White Airplane".
It does involve Japanese characters and a dash of bloodshed and murder, but
that's pretty much the only overlap with The Machine Girl! The White
Airplane is a four distinct scene play with an existential Twin Peaks vibe. British, Japanese, American, and French Canadian characters jump bodies through time and space with a White Airplane as their vehicle. Worth checking out
if you're in the hood.
